Recast
Anya writes to Ari. From ALPHABET, an ongoing novel.
Hello, thanks for your patience. I’m about to wipe this phone, so I wanted to make sure someone had these memories beforehand. We look really sweet in the photos. I’m going to be honest, I’ve been meaning to speak to you about our friendship for a while.
I’ve tried to respect your time and boundaries. I don’t feel that you have ever taken my life as seriously as your career, or most immediate social circle.
I don’t have time to unpack the years of coincidences. I may be in New York at some point in the next two years, and I’d be fine talking in person then if you are available. I want to forgive everything, but I cannot right now. I loved you more than anyone. I was so proud to know you, to have been close and witnessed your growth.
But the passive-aggressive conversations you force me to have, during times when I explicitly and repeatedly beg you to give me grace? That consistently puts my life in real danger. I had to postpone my wedding again. I have been sick. I missed the inauguration of Ireland’s second female president.
I understand that politics seem important to you. I did not choose to live this way. I receive no recognition, salary or royalties for the majority of my work, nor do I expect or want that. There are so many more important things than money and fame.
Joy has been stolen from me so, so many times throughout my life. I don’t know why you’d say that we were sisters, then try to contribute to that theft, however unintentionally you believe that you have acted.
You are the only person who could make me pause, and I do not feel that you have respected that responsibility. Please do not contact me, or speak about my life with people you don’t trust. To be frank, I am not able to rekindle any kind of relationship with you if you still speak to Eva Haynt in any way.
I am processing what she’s done, how many times I’ve tried to end that friendship, and how often you would believe her lies over everybody else and encourage me to see it from her perspective. That alone warrants some space.
One pattern that I feel may be relevant is that you might be projecting your feelings about Eva or Harry or your family onto me. The similarities between your perspective on my personal life, career, politics, academic CV, etc have become noticeable. Does that make sense? Because I do not understand who you think I am anymore.
Regardless, I’ll always root for you, and I know that you’ll continue to do great things. This life or the next, I love you.
Best,
Anya
Happy Thanksgiving.
The spanners that you, Graciela, and Eva threw into my life have delayed my plans so much that it will take 4 years to set things right. I do not care about your apologies or explanations, I trust nothing that you say. You will never hear from me again. Lose my contacts and keep my name out of your mouth. Good luck.
Best,
Anya
Hello:
The spreadsheet below is an itemized list of every cruel thing you’ve done to Anastasiia Lazarovichya de Franckelle consciously or otherwise, since you met as children. It is organized by:
Offense
Date
Time
Location
Evidence
Witnesses
Alternative choices you could have made
Unforeseen consequences that our client had to manage
Acknowledgement of offense, if applicable
We suggest not gossiping, much as you enjoy it as a primary hobby. We also suggest finishing your GED and enrolling in that bartending course Melissa recommended, or gaining some real-world experience for those sex work projects you’re always drafting. Good luck!
Regards,
Sir Charles Rothschild, Esquire
Rothschild & Son
